Plot Summary

What have I been doing this past two years? Apart from sitting on the settee in my pyjamas, squeezing my ingrowing hairs whilst watching documentaries on Ted Bundy? I have been staring into space, coming to the terrible realization that maybe my parents were right. I should have listened to them years ago. Why didn't I? But people keep telling me I'll be ok because I'm a strong woman. What does that mean? I survived The Island with Bear Grylls - who knew that would prepare me for what was about to come...